Mayonnaise Jar and 2 cups of coffee

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar… and the 2 cups of coffee..

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golfballs. He asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly, and the pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full; they agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous ‘yes.’

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand.

The students laughed.

‘Now,’ said the professor, as the laughter subsided, ‘I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things: your God,your family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favourite passions– things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter–like your job, your house, and your car. The sand is everything else: the small stuff.’

‘If you put the sand into the jar first,’ he continued, ‘there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.’

The same goes for life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first, the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.

One of the students raised his hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. ‘I’m glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there’s always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.’


got this from W’s blog. “when one has a boyfriend, will she lose her friends along the way?” ask me this a year ago, and i would have said no. very similar to her, i’ve always thought that as friends, we should be happy for them if they are able to find someone who might just be that lifetime partner of theirs. just because we don’t see it, it doesn’t mean they’re not putting in effort to make the relationship work. shouldn’t we be a little more understanding? besides, if we have confidence that our friendship is for real, why should we feel neglected or uncherished? if we have confidence that our friendship is for a lifetime, why should we disregard a friend or even sever the friendship?

a year and many experiences later, i realized i took for granted that my beliefs worked for others as well. friends whom i thought were for a lifetime, simply didn’t see it that way. friends whom i thought would understand my feelings, simply didn’t care. no, i’m not blaming anyone, but myself. especially after reading the above story, it made me realize that i cannot force my personal opinions on others. just because i think they shouldn’t mind, doesn’t mean they don’t. just because i think they should understand, doesn’t mean they do.

i admit poor time management back then was fault on my part, but i guess in actual fact, you’re no longer a friend if you cannot make it for weekly outings or gatherings anymore. eh?

W has always been the one i could relate to ever since my initial working days, despite our nearly 10-year (??) age difference. we’re similar in many ways, and unbelievably, i’m stuck in the same situation as her. we both accidentally lost a very good friend. despite trying to get the friendship back, we decided to forgo it in the end.

that friend i lost. yes i miss her. yes i miss those times. we both trusted each other to understand, but hey, fact remains the trust has been broken. if we’re both happy this way, so be it then. honestly speaking, i’d rather spend time perfecting current friendships then to harp on one that’s lost and forgotten. nevertheless, thanks, and i wish her the best in everything she does. 🙂


long gloomy post. my bad. let’s brighten things up.

can’t wait for next thurs – the start of my one week break before i move over to RT on 1st aug. it’s been a long while since i can officially take such a long break. ^_^ shall be using it to catch up on shopping and outings. jio meee~! lolx.

now for more random stuff. FTLY is getting boring, so i’ve moved on to others. rewatched all 3 series of kindaichi (matsumoto jun kawaii!!), and is currently watching detective conan. the live version of it uses oguri shun! he’s the one that played hanazawa rui in hana yori dango. super shuai ne! too bad in the anime, shinichi turns into a kid at the end of the first episode, so even if they made more live versions, oguri shun won’t be in it anymore. i love detective shows! hehx.

yes i’m still playing maple. yes i’m still playing audition. it adds a teeny weeny bit more life into my no-life working life. hmmm.. o.O

oh wells. i’m off. i should stop blogging in the office. lol!


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